J - the blue eyes that I cant stop thinking of

I've been writing and dreaming with things that I never experimented before..that I even didnt think that would happen to me...
I've been dreaming of love, of exchaging, of you...

And you came...first all I didnt believe that you wanted me to stay
You came back...and I didnt believe that you knew what you were doing...
Now...you want to go, but after all...I know that you place is here, close to me...you are not going to anywhere...or you will have to take me with you...

I found you inside of me...and then I found the meaning of love...I found the meaning of real love....

You are mine...we will dance forever...

All my love, for you, to you, with you

Turkish liras

I was walking there and I got here...so now I need to get back...I have this money in my hands, I know they are liras but you have to get them because I have to get back there...I thought there was here but as you said I was wrong...Do I need to dance? I can only dance with him...He's there...no, he cant come here now...if I go there I can dance, for you, yes...but with him...

I'm not sure if he'll let you watch because when we dance...is just magic and you wont probably understand...because when we dance...ups...Im back here...Do you want to dance with me??? Would you dance with me again? Can we just dance? Can we dance, dance, dance...over and over again?

ahhhhh, yes I do love dance with you as well.....

Make up

I can clean all the make up off my face and let you see what is behind all this, but you have to keep it to yourself...I don't want them to know what you do...don't tell them...

I can take my clothes off and be naked and dance for you, but please do not tell them that Im not perfect because I don't want them to know what you do...don't tell them

I can try to love you, I'll let you get closer, but please do not bring them, I can be myself with you but not with them...don't tell them that you know a different me, don tell them

Its our secret and you can tell them that you have me...you can tell them that you touch me, you can tell them that you are mine, you can...but don't tell them that Im scared...that I'm weak, that I cry...I like to think that they don't know...

Im just like you...we know this...You are just like me...I know this...but we just don't know how to be us...I do, I go, You did, you went...and...we just ... everything, but I just don't know how to do it...and I don't want to let them know...

You are just you...but sometimes you are with them...and there...I just cant be...and I lose myself, you, I have to put my clothes back on, do my make up and go...Keep myself busy and just do...I'm afraid that they could find out that I'm just not what they think I'm...

I'm getting old, but I lie about my age, I'm loosing my power, I cant run as fast I used to...Im tired and I just want to relax in your arms, just wrap me up, involve me...i just want to smile that way that I used to when you were around...

I didnt want to go...but I went...I don't know how to get back...Im tired, I dont have enough power and I miss you...don't tell them, they don't have to know...is just between us..can you keep a secret??? Im just scared because I know that I can love you...I know that I can...I almost do...

The blue aren't missing the green???

I miss you more than I thought that I would. I don't want to be with you because...for some reason I don't feel comfortable around you and I can't be myself...but I'm feeling so miserable that...
You will not change and I do not want to change myself either..I don't know, I just know that I miss your smell, your blue eyes, your kiss, your accent. You can not give me more and I need more..I want to be loved, I want to feel unique, special...I want to see myself inside your eyes..I want to be yours and I want to you to be mine, but you won't...you give yourself and after you step back again...

My green eyes are missing the blue ones...

We just do not know how to do it...What a pity...

I miss you...I miss you, and miss your touch, you touching me..

Geminiana EU..

cOmO pOdE uMa GeMiNiana DeCidiR...se meu coracao, alma, mente nao trabalham juntos, esto sempre em direcoes diferentes, com propositos diferentes e ainda se distraem no meio do percurso. Cheia de altos e baixos, de sim e naos, sempre procurando os porques, como ainda posso tomar decisoes. Num mundo cheio de opcoes, escolhas como e possivel decidir sem se questionar qual o melhor caminho, o melhor restaurante para aquela ocasiao, o melhor carro, o melhor emprego...comprar uma bolsa ou ir viajar, investir em um curso ou viajar novamente.
Alem ainda de ser dominada pela indecisao, de estar sempre confusa, perdida dentro da realidade que ja conheco, ainda optei por me envolver no meio artistico, de criar, ousar, deixar a sensibilidade aflorar e tomar conta do meu ser...querer me expressar. Cada dia acordo com um humor diferente, com um pensamento, uma meta, um ideal..que nao muda no geral, mas as cores, espaco, lugar, pessoas sempre estao a mudar...e dai como posso esperar que quem esta ao meu redor entenda e me de que eu preciso, se nem eu mesma sei o que quero.